| A goodbye..... |
[04 Feb 2004|08:36pm] |
I am saying goodbye to live journal. I find it easier to keep things to myself. I'd rather not let people know what I'm thinking... I'd rather be invisible. I have everything I need, I cannot take this as a comfort blanket that makes me think that somebody cares. I care for myself and that's enough for me. My opinions and thoughts are for myself. Glad I have someone to share my life with, and that's good enough for me. Thank you for reading, listening, but I'm done. Too bad I'm one to walk away from things, but I'll be happy to walk away from this. I don't need an outlet.. or a care, I have all the care I could possible need.
If anyone ever wants to email me, I'll be happy. The whole world won't need to bother themselves with my issues, and I wont' be bothered with theirs.
Goodbye to all you depressing people... I've found my sunshine
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[21 Jan 2004|09:59pm] |
My car, yes it is mine. Oh yes it is. the only bad thing... gas will be expensive. meh, but I'm sure my dad will give me the money for gas, honestly, my dad likes to pretend he has no money to give me just so I work for myself, but that's ok cause I nkow that if I really need his help then I'll be fine. It's nice to be without it for the most part, meh, you know what I mean? If it's there I'll take it... kinda like.... "take the money and run, take the money" "ice age comin'..." wow. I really need to get a treat and listen to radiohead... that's what I'll DO. BLAST IT IN MY ROOM... I'm in the mood for hail to the thief... or should I say..." the theif that should be praised"??? hahahaha, wow if you ever wanted to meet a nerd... yeah I'm a nerd, definetly.
My car is FFFOOOOOKKING RAD!! (haha that was spelled like that because I was thinking of liam galagher... silly british badass... yeah he's STILL like that.. haha it's great(yes I'm talking about oasis, deal with it))
WONDERWALL was the greatest hit... honestly, I'm sorry but I think that was a GREAT HIT from the 90's no matter what you may actually. think.
Bush is annoying me...I need to vote. heh heh, I know it would be really "liberal" of me to vote for howard dean, but I think I'm going to anyways. But I've got time to think about it. yup... yippeee for me... meh.
This was too long.. it's cause I'm bored and I'm at school... brilliant!ˇ
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[19 Jan 2004|10:54pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 excited |
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So wow, I think there's a girl named Naomi, who currently OWNS a radical 74 dart swinger... yeah that's what I hear anyways
oh yeah baby, mhmmm... that's right.
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| The answer |
[19 Jan 2004|09:54am] |
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the answer....?
Life is unfair, kill yourself or get over it.
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| Love lifts us up where we belong |
[17 Jan 2004|08:31pm] |
For anyone in this world who isn't love, I pity you. I think I'm the luckiest girl on eath... yup I am.
I LOVE SEAN MAURER!! hee hee, it's so fun to say that, it's all too true. It feels really great to say it. YES YES, I'm in love!!
LLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVVVVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEE!!!
shout it from the mountain on high! Yup, that's what I ought to do.
Yeah, I'm ready for all your cynical remarks.. but if you've lost your faith in love and music then the end won't be long... heh, that's a Libertines quote.. good song.
well... my day has been great. It's all because of love.
WOW WWWWWWWWWWWEEEEEEEEEEE WOW WOW!!! Time to love some more!
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| it's optional |
[15 Jan 2004|10:24am] |
Well, I'm feeling REALLY HAPPY! MUAHAHA.... WOW, I AM HHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAPPPPPYYYY. hee hee hee.
Lets think, today was a good day... well it's actually only just started, so it could end in a rotten way, who knows. I'm in the photo room.
let me just say that I've figured it all out, BAH, it's really great. no no, I'm not a jerk or anything, I'm just satisfied with my conclusions. It's great.
there's something I want to paint... blasted Oh gosh, I have assignments to do like no other... farewll to the journal for now.
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| Listen to the ways of the street |
[11 Jan 2004|09:31pm] |
I think I drive too fast.. maybe not.. I feel like I do though. Maybe I'm jsut being silly. I hear I'm a safe driver... so I'm not all that exciting.
Well. we have school tomorrow. yeah for that. Photo must be done! and pottery !! my my!
TODAY was.... WHO CARES ABOUT TODAY!! TOMORROW SOUNDS BETTER!!
you know what song I like?? that Frank Sinatra song... "COME FLY WITH ME" yeah it's radical. I watched "two weeks notice" tonight. it was on tv. YEAH I LIKE THAT MOVIE! good soundtrack except for one crappy song... actually.. it's not that spectacular, there's just a few good songs, nothing to jump up about. But yeah... honestly what's everyone got against hugh grant?? HE's an awesome british fellow, he's charming, yeah that's what I said.... I LIKE HIM OK! Now you can yell at me... fine.
WIT MY FRIENDS!! being sharp is radical... and that word... "radical" sounds great. But honestly, those smart witty people that only exist in books that know exactly what to say and everyone hates them cause they're so sharp and witty and make everyone else look like a complete idiot... yeah they're incredible. Wish I was like that.. heh heh... hmmmm that makes me curious.. oh blasted, now I'm thinking again.
I used to want to be a super villian, and rule things. Why do bad guys get such a tough break? they could want to rule the world without being "evil" but they always have to make them evil... it's silly really. I think I'll take over a small island country, that would be cool... but it kinda sucks not having borders cause then you have to spend more money... and trading.. oh gosh, what a hassle. I think that's why I dropped the whole idea... too much work.
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| are you a hardcore hooligan? |
[11 Jan 2004|12:16pm] |
Why do people have to hurt people?? I'm not talking about physically, I mean mentally, and emotionally. That's not fair.
What have I done?? my goodness. Planning to stay away for the entire day in hopes that I end up feeling like shit for not actually doing anything wrong. Honestly. Look at it?! there's nothing there. So lets stop whining and crying about nothing. My goodness.
I think I'm going to sew some more today. I made a cool bag.. yeah, I may have already mentioned that. Church and religion is silly, let's face it. Glad some people like it, but it isn't for me.
Yeah, plan is working. I feel awful for not doing anything, so it looks like I'm going to be saying sorry for nothing. my goodness. WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME???
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| One thing and then another... take me away from all that... Oh no.. here I go... |
[10 Jan 2004|04:19pm] |
WELL... today was strange. everything completely off balaance. once I wake up my family was like.. "hey we're all going shopping and you HAVE to come" ... um yeah so I went with them.. boring. heh, but a perk was that I got a bunch of material and I'm sewing a purse today... that is incredibly awesome. But then.. balh forget it. I'm going with sara to the show tonight. WHOOT WHOOT. that'll be cool... I need to get out and clear my head. My mom got mad at me for reading books with "bad language" I guess I'm going to start saying fuck this and FUCK that now that I've ruined my brain.. WAAA WAA... bleh.
SEWING TIME!
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[09 Jan 2004|11:40pm] |
LAAAA laaa laa la lalaaaa... singing is fun.
heh. Today was funny. I woke up late, went to bed early. Then I went to hang out with Sean at his house. That was nice cause I missed him like a crazy person. Then I went home and I learned that I hurt my dad's feelings cause I was being mean to him last night cause I was moody and I wanted to go to bed early and didn't feel like working on computers and such fiddle faddle. meh... moving right along. Then I sit here at my computer wondering what I'm going to do... and that this has been an awful icy time. Oh well.
One thing I thought was interesting. i was in the car listening to the radio, and this man had been taken to court because he had learned that a neighbor of his had been sexually abusing children, so he went over, took and axe handle and beat the guy up. Now he's on trial for it. I don't know.... honestly, the charges should be dropped. I don't know why people freak out about people getting in fights, he didn't kill anyone, and he had a GOOD reason for beating him. If you wanna hurt innocent helpless people you should expect to get beat up senseless, cause that's exactly what you deserve... bastards
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| k;lvanmdviadnfla;ksdn;lknfdasdl;kfas;dlkn |
[08 Jan 2004|06:01pm] |
RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRR! Death to the ice! I will crush you! Yes you can actually see the results of my wrath on the street... all crushed ice and death to them! MUAHAHAHA... yes it's all true. I hate the weather, and I will kill it... but, it was nice, but now it's just evil!!
I MISS MY LAD!!! My fellow... now I'm just whining.... I hate live journal, but........THERE'S NOTHING ELSE TO DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! INSUFFERABLE!
at the beginning....Oh yeah, that was a growl alright... you bet it was.
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| Everyday I'm alive. |
[08 Jan 2004|11:10am] |
hmmm... reviewing some music.. the stills? yeah, new hott band so "they" say. Reminds me of the strokes... yeah, at least this first song, but, it's a little more "honest" than that. Reminds me of something else also... can't really pin point it yet. Oh well. OH I KNOW WHAT IT IS.... it's fair.
It's really icy today... the worst day of them all. it's cold, and it's sad that I can't really be or GO anywhere, I'm tired of being at home... but I suppose it would be a good opportunity for me to get some things done that I say I never have the time for. I can always read a book, knitt, talk to myself, paint, or put together some crazy idea of mine... I'll be fine, there's plenty to do. Actually, i think I'm going to update my site, that'll be good.
Ever wonder about stuff?? heh... yeah... I feel like dancing to the beat of the crazy rock'n roll drums... dance party!! whoot whoot.
Haha, I love how I'm so bored that I'm posting something everyday on this... it's kinda funny.
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| Well well well |
[07 Jan 2004|10:48pm] |
WOW. Today was interesting. i got to talk to a lot of old friends, and it was cool. I feel loved, and I feel kinda empty at the same time. But not really. I have a love, and that's spectacular.
what happened today?
-talked to Sean first thing... that was nice :)
-woke up, made breakfast, watched music videos, and critized everything with my sister, it was kinda fun.
-Went out in the back yard with alicia, and we slide around on our little snow boogie board thingy's talking in british accents pretending we were discovering the ice age.. or some kinda catastrophe that left the top layer of the earth sheilded with solid ice. It was fun because I got to lick my entire yard, from one end to the other.. HAHA, wow GOOD TIMES. I actually did that.
-knitted a scarf (still in the process) using drumsticks as my kneedles... it looks pretty cool actually.
-hmmmm..... talked to my brother, an old friend, and another friend... all people from afar that like chatting with me. good stuff.
-then... well the rest is borning... oh Chrisitina my little sister made us pretend she was the teacher and we were in school, and she was trying to explain brain surgery to us but she was going offf, and then I asked her about war, then she was describing the outfits men wear in the army, and that guns hurt people, but she didnt' really know how.... it was pretty hilarious I must say.
OK enough, no school tomorrow again, and I really need to do assignments, blast it all!
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| if I laughed in your face I'm sorry, but I'm still laughing. |
[06 Jan 2004|09:52pm] |
Honestly, I can't be honest. Not with the world. with myself, I can... quite so. Not the world/humans in general. But that's ok, I like my privacy. I enjoy being alone. I enjoy picnics with champagne, I enjoy hiking alone, singing songs of hopeless feelings to myself, and I enjoy being SO hopeless, that it turns into hope. Honestly. Depression isn't all it's cracked up to be. Everybody hurts, and everybody cries. depression often makes you ask "WHY OH WHY!??" why not? coming to the relization that shit happens... then, make your life the most amazing spectacular event that you will ever encouter, because who knows what follows next. If I was lonely, I would be comfortable being alone. I've never REALLY felt bad about it. they tell me it's sad, but it's quite comforting... because you can always trust yourself.
yeah... just some thoughts running through my head.
wow. I don't know what I want to do. Well, I'm living in france, that's for sure, and that's all I know right now... ambitious, and ridiculous... and I don't care. I'll raise my glass to myself for once, and that's all.
no school tomorrow by the way.
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| HA! me? do something for someone else? how silly! |
[04 Jan 2004|02:29pm] |
heh, just kidding, my mom wants me to go to the bloody store. blast.
OH OH, I had the greatest memory, just today, dearest christa marie, my childhood friend! AHH, the time whn we pretended we were conjoined ballarina twins and alicia the king (making us conjoined PRINCESS ballarina twins) announced us as the her lovely twins that projected pure grace and elegance (oh and let us not forget the famous boaty blanket around alicia's shoulders, classic)... hahaha, our two legs fitting in one leg hole of the bright blue ridiculous looking tu-tu... OH what a sight. Then we come marching out of our room... and tried to dance in front of our mothers.. then we toppled all over the floor... yeah we were the most brilliant children... no doubt. SIGH. blasted. I miss you. I miss our fun times... us running on the streets... you with the snake in your boot running to the park as me and hannah pointed and laughed as loud as we could. .. the stroller club, my hurtful carpet, our get rich quick flops.... GOOOOOOOOOOD TIMES.
I'm going to give you a call sometime this week, don't you worry.
To the others... Sail your ships.. don't be afaid, you can be whatever, or do anything you want. OH yes, and Lisa Hannagin is a lovely singer, and she's beautiful.
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| still a little bit... |
[03 Jan 2004|05:55pm] |
FOOLS!
ok, well I was going to get a car today but it was a useless piece of shite.
Um... listening to damien rice. I had to help my dad take down the christmas lights.. I whined about that. but it was fine... lights... BAH!
jsut for the record, I hate the Corrs... OK! I've heard like 5 of their songs today... yesterday, it's still in my head, damn you sharis!! oh yeah and at pizzacato, they played that song that she sang with bono. WHY??? bono kicks ass, just for the record. but yeah... why did he have to sing with them?? nerd.
hmmm.... being cynical isn't a good thing... wait, no it is. it's hilarious. blah, I just don't bother.. wait, forget it, this has nothing to do with anything. HA.
um... yeah hee hee.. my boyfriends here... SIGH!! I feel so happy.
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| boggled thoughts that circled my brain throughout the day... |
[29 Dec 2003|05:43pm] |
There is something interesting... ha, yeah I'm easily amused..(yeah that's funny, heh)
I'm bored, yeah I am, actually, I was playing harmonica for awhile, that was awesome. Then... well, I thought, meh computer might be good. If i die, i will die with CLASS! honestly... classy people are the best. when i have my own house, classy people coming to my cocktail party's and such. Yea, that will be me, for sure.
Oh yeah... talked to my friend from france, yeah I'm living with her for sure (pretty much). Life is good. we can relate on so many levels. It's really great. huh, interesting, Marselles has a lot of crime, maybe I can join a french gang......Wait, a CLASSY one... goodness. of course it has to be classy, it'll be more like the french mob.
ha, and I just missed a call, lovely.
If all else fails, I'm thinking about being a con artist, that'll be fun. (i watched the sting last night... YUM, robert redford and paul newman....lovely)
yes, I'm bored. I went to Pioneer place today, yeah the gap couldn't take off the plastic tag, so I couldn't buy the shirt I wanted, rotton bastards, can't even properly take off a tag?? jjjeeeeeeezus. People are such idiots.. wow, I sound like such a snobby jerk. HA, that's funny.
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| BAH, never again... that is silly |
[28 Dec 2003|05:10pm] |
WOW, it's been far too long. hi everyone, I'm not here, this isn't happening. Good song.
Now, let me think. Christmas was good, I got a sewing machine, that's what I wanted.. and a bunch of other stuff.. OOoOOO, I got a harmonica (and some other stuff) from Sean, wow, that was waaaaaayyy awesome, I pretty much played with that for 2 hours straight. Oh and let us not forget my drunken self on christmas eve... champagne (why is that?) but yeah... they call me the drunkard.. Oh pish posh... me? a drunkard?? never. (hee hee) But seriously, I love dancing to christmas tunes and arguing about church, BAH. christmas has been good. (guys, relax, I'm not a drunkard)
On the downside, (what a shame) I didn't get enough money to go shopping (for myself that is) so I whine. yeah, and I think my grandmother is getting alzheimers (spelling??) and she's not as happy as she used to be. She seems all angry, it's making me sad. My aunt is anorexic, she's really quiet.. some more drugs I'll assume.. Drugs, doctors who perscribe all that medicine, people are so easy to fool... why can't we just be animals??
My vacation is kind of ruined cause family is here, and i feel guilty for going out. ugh. Ok, ummm... knitters in the house? we need to go knit. like tomorrow or something. We'll have to work that out.
Oh and Sara and Eddie, sorry I didn't get to sit by you during LOTR, blasted, Sean was being an idiot that night... I wanted to congregate with fellow fans. blasted, but still a good movie (but of course) let us knit together.
Oh, and just for the record, Edwin's live journal is most interesting, i enjoy reading it.
today was a bad day, well, maybe not so much "bad" as just "BLAH", but that is actually a bad thing, but not terrible. .... haha, I can't believe how much I hate church. it's really ridiculous.
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[19 Dec 2003|12:46am] |
HAHA, yeah, about my last post. I like live journal cause i like to hear what's up with steph, giselle.... christa, all my party people! WHOOT WHOOT! haha, that's a funny thing to say.
Ok well it's friday, and I am soooooo HAPPY ABOUT IT! BREAK TIME!! Gonna have some fun, Scott's coming out, grandparents... my house is going to be so absolutely insame, it's not even funny... you have no idea. my goodness you have NO IDEA! As if my house isn't a madhouse already... it's always been... all this hubub and noise... that's my home. PEOPLE ALL OVER THE BLOODY PLACE!! Oh well... haha, it makes things interesting. yup.
hee hee.......... I'm in photo... I love Mr RAY!! I have an A in this class cause I'm too cool for school! BAHAHAHAHA! Ok, enough of that. I am so pleased with my progress report, it's really smashing. This movie they're showng... I thought it was MAD MAX for a second... woah. haha, "mad max" that's funny.
3 different people called me weird today... woah, I guess I am kinda weird. That's cool though, I respect that. (heh heh)
Ok, well I'm seing lord of the rings sunday night, if anyone wants to come that'd be rockin'... PEACE OUT FOR THE GOOD DAY THAT TODAY IS!!
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| We're cool, we're different, and we hate things, yeah we hate things... we hate people! |
[17 Dec 2003|06:28am] |
Yeah... wow... just been thinking about that. GOOD SONG. It's been awhile since I've posted anything. meh, I dunno. I guess it's cause I feel more comfortable with my life, and heh, I'm not really to jumpy about letting the whole world know what goes on in my life. It's hard to be a private person.... yeah, but I guess I don't really need to post anything too interesting. But, then I'd just be boring, heh... boring with the basic crap everyday. Who wants to read that??? BUT, why do any of us write about ourselves and let everyone read about it?? It's for no other purpose but to make people interested in you... you write for people to read... no one's writing just because. You WANT people to know.... yeah. So, I dunno. I feel odd telling the world about my life. But I guess I can always talk about how I went to grocery store and such fiddle faddle. HA, people are the most amusing, irratating, hurtful, awful little creatures... honestly.
Today was a bad day.. people are stupid.
BUT, the day is a good one, because it ended well. I made pizza today. My mom is throwing a little christmas party??? HA, wow. Well, I suppose I'll just eat all the food.... WOAH, these holidays are going to make me one fat little buggar.
WOW, black rebel motorcycle club... YYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAA!!!!!! cannot resist the all powerful screams. Jesus bless rock n' roll
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